The FatCat Score
Scroll to find it.
Seven scored vitals and the money leaks priced from your own numbers. Then a plan, drawn as a plan: what to do now, what next, what later, and the one number that will prove each move worked. In plain words, every term explained where it stands.
Composite 75/100 · could sit 64–76
Now · answer enquiries within an hour
Next · ask for the review at checkout
Proof it worked · reply time, funnel tracker
A file you hand to ChatGPT or Claude that makes it your marketing lead. Your economics, your voice, your customers' exact words, your no-go list, ready-made prompts. Stop re-explaining your business to a chatbot.
§5 VOICE · match this, don't describe it
§6 CUSTOMER LANGUAGE · verbatim bank
§12 KNOWN UNKNOWNS · never invent these
“You are now the marketing lead for…”
Do what the plan says, then re-score. Your answers carry over and you change only what moved. The numbers the plan told you to watch are read again, and the ones that moved the right way earn their points. Progress you can point at.
Jan · 52
Apr · 61
Jul · 64
Now · 75 ↑ execution +2
The board
What you told us, what your accounts show, what your files say, what you track, and what the engine found, all on one wall, with a line wherever two of them agree, explain each other, or do not add up. This one is a sample. Yours is built from your own evidence.
The house rule
No. 1
Same answers, same score. The number can't be charmed, so it means something.
No. 2
If you didn't answer it, it's listed as unknown, with what knowing it would be worth.
No. 3
The report quotes you back to yourself. If you said it, it's in quotes. Never rewritten.
Re-scores are the point. Answers carry over, you update what changed, and the graph on your dashboard becomes the story of your marketing getting better.
The score
$45
one-time · both artifacts · yours to keep
Then that IS the finding. 'I don't track this' is a first-class answer; the report shows what knowing it would be worth and which numbers to start writing down.
The words are AI-written; the score is not. Scoring is deterministic arithmetic over your answers; the same inputs always produce the same result, and every claim traces to something you said.
Founders and owner-operators doing their own marketing: a two-chair salon, a seed-stage SaaS, a nonprofit of one. If you have a marketing team of ten, you need a different tool.
You keep everything. Fill the trackers and add files whenever you like, free. When you re-score, the numbers the plan told you to watch are read again, and the ones that moved earn their points.